Friday, December 29, 2006

CH 4: Choice

Words sounded aloud when the wise man said that I had already made the decision about where my journey was going to take me. With that in mind I opened the door in front of me.

A gush of electricity flew into my veins. 'We have a breath' shouted a man. 'He is moving', said someone. I heard the beeping sound of the machine and from there on it was a long road to recovery. Lots of friends asked me how those days were and all I would ever say to them was that 'it felt like eternity'. Some would laugh, some would show their concern and some would shout at me but everyone knew that i was in coma.

Days went by and I grew stronger. Slowly then i started to speak about the events that occurred while I was in coma. Doctors came up with reasons as to it being nothing more than a dream. But I was convinced about the events and could vividly recollect the feeling of being free from everything while in front of that table. I wondered many times if this is the moment that I am being watched by the wise man and will I make the choice of meeting him again but then as wise man said if I wondered then i am not being watched by him. So slowly even those thoughts left my mind.


Many questions remained unanswered. What happened to the guy who was talking to me at the table? What would it be like to be a part of eternity? What choice did others make in that room? Will i ever be able to find answers to these questions? I don't know. But all i know is that, I was given a chance to choose and my choice is there for everybody to see. I could never leave her or mom alone in this world and thats when I made the choice that I had to come back no matter what.

Thursday, December 21, 2006

CH 3: Reason

Incidents folded in front of us one by one and things started to become clear. The wise man showed events that occurred in everyones life and from those events it became clear that all of us sitting at the table were here because of a wish. Everbody at the table even though of different color, caste, creed or from different world so to speak off had all made a wish, a wish to be 'Far Away'.

Wise Man continued 'All of you sitting here had once in your life wished to travel. A journey that will take you to far off places, a journey that will take you to stars, a journey that will free you from thoughts of who you are'. Everybody was now listening carefully to what the wise was saying.

He told everyone about the journey that we were going to make. It was something different from the one that I was used to making as a sales agent selling stocks and products from one place to another. 'Are you talking about moksha', asked a man at the table. (MOKSHA is a term used in Buddhism, Hinduism, Jainism as freedom from the differentiated, temporal, and mortal world of ordinary experience). 'Moksha to some and eternity to others' said the wise man. There was a big hush in the room. Sense of peacefulness or freedom at the table made sense now.

'Many of people have wished for moksha then why us why not others' asked me. 'Many of them wish, not just you people but the wish that are granted are the once that are not made under any influence. Many of them wish that they become young, many that there should be peace in world, many wish to take the same journey as you all did but not all come here' said the wise. 'The wish made by these people is done under the inflence of circumstances which are created and ruled by them. So it comes down to them to handle it'. I realized then the calm that I felt before making the wish, the morning rays had freed me from all the influences.

'Wish and the reason brought you till here, now its up to you to continue the journey, a decision that you all have already made' said the wise. Doors appeared in front of us and each one took the door of their choice to what lied ahead.

Friday, December 15, 2006

CH 2: Wish

Early morning was pretty cold in Darjeeling. Had a long day ahead. We had to see many places, for after two days it was back to the hurry burry life in Chennai. Mum dressed me up quickly, I was the first person to get dressed and be set for the day ahead. It was a morning full of enthusiasm. I was jumping on the cot doing my best to mess up the room. My brother started shouting coz I was jumping on his new pants on the cot. Papa also shouted hearing the noise in the room. I got scared and ran to the balcony and sat on the old chair.

Thats when I saw the view that I will never forget for rest of my life. A big fire ball emerged from behind the mountains. Sun was looking the biggest that I have ever seen in my life. Rays of sun allayed my body which was shivering because of the cold himalayan winds. It filled me up with warmth when the first rays of the morning fell on me. I felt such peace inside me. All the excitement and enthusiasm about the trip was gone and I felt big calm in me at that moment.

My thoughts started to diverge from the fun filled trip of Darjeeling to my grandpa and grandma. They used to be around me all the time and then suddenly one day they left me. Whenever I asked my mum about them she used to reply that they have gone to a trip in the sky and used to point to the sky at the most shining star and say there they are.

During the days when grandpa and grandma were here with me their stories used to calm me to a good night and peaceful sleep. Since sun had filled me up with same warmth and peace I knew that they were there. Situation reminded me of What my dad used to say, 'Son everyone one day has to make journey to the stars'.

At that time with complete peace in my mind I whispered 'I want to be there where you guys are and want to be like you'. Then suddenly my mom came rushing and pulled me from the chair saying we are late.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

CH 1: Table of Freedom

What if I am not able to see her again? What if mom never understands what happened to me? Why am i so scared? So beautiful is the smell of green. So fresh is the air around me. Ah is this the end?

Sitting there i felt a sense of freedom within me. No questions thought of and no answers sought after. I was just flowing with time. I was in a state where I couldn't distinguish between emptiness of or satisfaction in my mind. Such was the freedom from thoughts which I was feeling moments ago.

'Join us bro' came a sound as a man neared me. I had never met him before. Hi How r u? replied me (this is the standard question i asked everyone). 'Doing good bro. You are doing much better than rest of us'. I turned around to see seven more in the room. Then i snaped back wondering where am i? Last thing i remember was driving in I-95. 'Gotcha didn't i?' sounded the voice again. Funny normally i would be bit scared seeing so many new faces around me, confused i would be as to how to respond to everyone, but such feelings where just not there, not in front of this table. I asked him 'Mate who r u and where am i?'. He said 'Thats exactly what i want to know? I remember myself sitting on the mountain top with bullet in stomach looking at beautiful Africa and here i am now sitting besides you in fornt of this table. Slowly the conversation grew and i explained what happened to me at I-95.

There was lots of murmur going in the room when a tall man with white beard entered into the room. He could easily make it to the wise man charactor of a book like 'Harry Potter' or 'Lord of the rings'. 'Its enough' shouted the man. 'I heard what you were thinking' (looking at me). I just thought to myself whether i said that comment or was i just thinking and did he just say that he could hear my thoughts.

'Welcome to the Table of freedom' said the wise man. You guys are here because you all wanted to be here, you all have wished for the same thing which brings you here. We all looked at one another (this is moment which should have confused the hell out of everyone yet no-one was confused). I was missing something inside me but did not know what was that nor did I want to.

Person i was speaking to earlier said, 'Yah! but where are we?'. You are within yourself, you are with time said the wise. Probably Albert Einstein could have made sense of what he was telling but for us it was again that state of emptiness or satisfaction.